You’ve heard of fashion don’ts before, but what about relationship don’ts? While each relationship is different, there are some things that are recipes for unhappiness in nearly any relationship. And unlike fashion don’ts, these relationship don’ts never change with shifting trends. Here’s what you shouldn’t be doing in your relationship:
This can seem like an obvious one, but the degree to which honesty is lacking in many relationships is shocking. To be sure, you don’t have to tell your partner the details of every interaction in your daily life. But if there’s something going on that your partner would be upset by, or would want to know, you’re lying. Lying tears down intimacy and you’ll almost always get caught. Just don’t do it.
Don’t Wage War With Family or Friends
The people in your significant other’s life are there for a reason, and odds are good they’ll continue to be there no matter what you do. You don’t have to love them; you don’t even have to like them. But you should try to do both, and if you can’t manage it, you at least have to show them respect. If you don’t, you’ll isolate your significant other from the people he or she cares about, or you’ll risk losing your significant other altogether.
Don’t Ignore Problems
Fighting is not a sign of a bad relationship. It’s what people do when they respect each other and want to remedy a problem. Don’t ignore problems and assume they’ll go away. Instead, talk to your significant other about the problem in a way that is respectful and loving and resolve to fix it together.
Don’t Neglect Each Other
Relationships begin to fall apart when people begin to take each other for granted. You love this person for a reason, and should take every opportunity you can to show that love.
Don’t Hold Grudges
All long term relationships have their share of ups and downs, But the happy relationships are the ones in which the partners are able to move forward and forget about past wrongs. Don’t hold that thing your husband or wife did a year ago against him or her; instead talk about it, move past it, and forgive.
Mistakes Were Made, But Not By Me by Carol Tavris